The Journey of Finding Myself After Marriage, Children, Separation, and Divorce

A story of triumph by Dr. Wycondia West

Dr. Wycondia West December 2021

Let me begin by saying that most women give of themselves wholeheartedly, but we rarely
receive that same energy. We give to our husbands, children, careers, ministries, and families in
expectation of reciprocity. I learned this valuable lesson of reciprocity after my eight-year marriage
began to fall apart only after about two years of marriage. I had my two children 13 months apart. This
was the beginning of my weight gain. Both of my pregnancies were high risk because of my age and
weight, and both babies were C-sections because I weighed over 400 pounds.

Dr. Wycondia West with her children in 2019

During my marriage, separation, and divorce, I was under an overwhelming amount of stress: my
children were young; I was a full-time entrepreneur; and I was trying to complete my doctorate degree. To add to that stress, I had to deal with mental and verbal abuse from my unfaithful husband. Most of my eating took place late at night whenever I was at the computer. Of course, at night I wasn’t paying attention to what I was putting in my mouth. I was a stress eater and carb addict. My weight continued to increase drastically, so during my visits to my primary doctor, she stopped weighing me because the scale only went up to a certain number. Even with that reality, I didn’t stop overeating. Food made me feel safe and comfortable.

In April of 2015, I finally separated from my husband and filed for divorce. This was so scary
and stressful. I felt so lost and alone. I was so close to completing my doctorate degree, NOW THIS. My
children were approximately four and five years old, and I stayed with my mother for about a year. I was still working my business full-time, but I didn’t have much money. I cried a lot. I ate a lot. I worked a
lot. It was a mental roll coaster. I was losing myself, but I had to keep myself together for my kids and
my clients. Amazingly, my business started to boom, but my weight was booming out of control.
Finally, in 2018, God sent an angel to plant a seed in me concerning my health. I believe I was
on my third visit to Greenville Technical in Greenville, South Carolina. I was working with the Upward
Bound students for a week of test prep. When the program concluded, the director, Dr. Alecia Watt
came by to speak to me, as she always did. To my surprise, she told me to come by her office after we
completed everything in the student center. The conversation that we had in Dr. Watt’s office changed
the trajectory of my life. I received her words about life and health, but I wasn’t ready to take action.

Dr. Wycondia West with Dr. Alecia Watt in 2018
Dr. Wycondia West 2018
Dr. West pictured here helping students, while battling her own personal problems. 2018

In 2019, I had to participate in a “sleep study”. Yes, I was placed on the CPAP machine. I lost a
few pounds but nothing drastic because my mindset hadn’t shifted fully. In October of 2020, in the
midst of the pandemic, I decided that this would be my opportunity to take control of my life. I realized
how God was covering me while I was carrying this excess weight. It dawned on me that I could’ve had
a heart attack or stroke years ago. God was covering me. It dawned on me that I could’ve been a
diabetic, or I could’ve had high cholesterol years ago. God was covering me. God had blessed my
business tremendously, even during the pandemic!

Recent photo of Dr. Wycondia West

So, it was time for me to make a sacrifice in 2020. I decided that it was time to release the stress and excess weight. Here I am today over 100 pounds lighter! Now, when I walk pass the mirror, I give a smile because I can barely recognize that 6X girl anymore. That 6X girl went through the fire, but today she’s shining like a DIAMOND!

Dr. Wycondia West

Instagram: @drwsw
West Instructional Services